The Confidence Doc

Confidence and Self-Worth: Self-Esteem Matters to Your Health!

Confidence and self-worth, regardless of what some psychologists say, does matter.  Really now, if you think of yourself as acceptable and worthy, why would this be considered selfish? 

In fact if you are comfortable in your own skin, you are at least less likely to be paranoid about yourself in relation to others and less likely to see the world as a scary, competitive place to live.  This matters as far as your health is concerned as well.  Think about this; in recent decades, as people become more focused “fighting” cancer, stress and the cancer rates have actually accelerated.  This is related to the principle that what you focus on expands, even if you “don’t want” it.  You are giving your creative energy to whatever you keep your attention on.

The more fearful and constricted you feel about yourself and life, the more disease, or, “dis-EASE” you are likely to experience.  Here is an interesting quote I found this evening from a Mayo Clinic internist who studies mind-body medicine:

"Several studies over the years have found links between altruistic behavior and improved physical and psychological health," says Dr. Ann Vincent, an internal medicine physician at Mayo Clinic who researches the mind-body connection. "In general, I think altruism makes people feel better about themselves, which often translates into improved physical health. Other benefits that have been attributed to positive emotions include: enhanced creativity and ability to cope with stress and broadened cognition. In essence, thinking positively about ourselves is good for our physical and mental health."  (December 8, 2008 CarolinaCoastonline.com  http://tiny.cc/YUUZ4)

Confidence: Your Response Ability Reflects Your Inner Power

Confidence has to do with managing your own thoughts, feelings and emotions.  Your perceptions are changeable to the degree that you take conscious control over the management of your own inner world.  Most people seem to be too pre-occupied with what others are doing to the neglect of their own personal development. 

This tendency is often related to the egoic need to deny our own weaknesses, which will also cause us to not develop our strengths and talents.  It is not what happens to you that determines the outcome of your life, but how you RESPOND to the situations and circumstances that you encounter. 

You have a unique destiny that you can move consciously toward, or if you choose to stay asleep and sleep walk through life you will tend to stumble into a fate that is less elegant and empowered.  The choice is ultimately yours as we have been given the gift of free will. 

This free will though, is dependent upon your level of conscious awareness.  If you stay in the victim, blame game mode, you will feel that you are simply tossed to-and-fro upon the waves of life.  However, once you are willing to accept yourself where you are and become willing to take responsibility without blame, you can consciously start to develop your “response ability”. 

This is your ability to make conscious choice about where you want to go.  Where ever you currently find yourself was created by past choices and decisions, whether consciously or unconsciously chosen.  The key is to in the present time, the now, start to learn how to manage the way that you think and feel, setting conscious intention to heal illusions and perceptions that limit you, and change the energy that is constrictive and non-productive to one that is expansive and full of possibility. 

Self-Mastery and the Purpose of Your Life

Self-mastery begins by slowing down your over-stressed mind and learning how to separate your sense of self from your thoughts.  You are not your thoughts!  You see, thoughts are “things”. 

They are electromagnetic waves of energy and information that is processed by your brain, which acts as a receiver, and your nervous system.  Thoughts are more complex than simply calling them “brain waves”, but they are a part of your bio-magnetic field as a living being, so they are energetic in nature.  The way that your brain interprets this information will be based on your unique perceptual system involving emotion, long-term memory and pre-conditioned beliefs.  I believe that our main purpose in this lifetime is to understand the difference between identifying your sense of self with thought and the truth about your Nature as a Spiritual Being. 

We are to experience life as the human experience, however, the vast majority of us become trapped in our minds with all of the conditioned thoughts of lack, limitation and fear, most of which we start to identify with as facets of our very “self”. 

The ego is what we think about ourselves.  Our identification with our thoughts is so pronounced that there is even something called “egoic marketing” in which your sense of inadequacy or insecurity is appealed to and is subliminally snagged by people marketing their products to you as a consumer. 

What you think is mental and what you are is at the essence level of being, the Observer of the thought; they are two different things.  You are not the thinker that thinks the thought; you are the Observer of the thought! 

Core Confidence: Deliver Us From Fear!

Confidence is an asset in today’s world for sure.  However, this confidence will need to come from “the inside out”.  Why? - Because if you are looking to the outer world to provide your sense of peace or to validate you, you are in trouble. 

In fact don’t hold your breath or it truly will be your last one!  If you are focusing on the external world, the world of the media, what others are saying about you, or trusting in your job for security, you are being driven by fear. 

Fear.  An acronym for fear is “False Evidence Appearing Real”.  Why false? 

First of all, rarely is anything as it appears.  For one reason, what you see in a situation in general is going to be based on your own perceptual system or unique wiring.  My reality and your reality can be very different.  This is due to our core belief system. 

If you have wired yourself, even if it is unconsciously, to expect the worse, you are going to find the worse in any given set of circumstances.  This is because the brain and mind act like a missile seeking machine in its ability to find what you are expecting to find. 

The Confidence to Imagine a New Reality

Confidence and self-image can have a major influence on your experience of life.  It appears to me that most people think that the way that they experience life is “just the way life is”. 

They say things like “get real” or “welcome to reality” or they think that if someone is habitually happy that that person must have their “head in the sand”.  Actually, reality is relative.  My reality is not your reality and vice versa. 

There is a lot or room for diversity of experience and how you perceive the world will make a difference in how you experience the world.  Your perception of life is not written in stone, it can be change with conscious choice.  What you see in your world presently came from previous choices. 

The way that you think and feel will determine your actions.  Your actions will ultimately create your habits and your habits are the foundations upon which you life is built.  Change your thinking and you will ultimately build different habits. 

Since we think in pictures, and the mind does not distinguish between something that is vividly imagined and felt and something that you are actually experiencing, you can begin to consciously co-create your “reality” by beginning with a new end result in mind. 

Core Confidence: Getting In the Flow

When confidence comes from your core, you can get into the flow of life instead of living in the space of hard work and struggle.  When you start from within, your outer experience can come from the place of Grace; you can flow with ease and creativity.

I use to be very driven and totally goal focus.  I could not enjoy my journey.  My motto was “whether or not I feel like it is beside the point, - just get it done”.  My body of course was pushed to the max in those days. 

I am extremely fortunate to still be in excellent health, as this is not the norm.  Most people do not realize how much of a negative impact stress has on the health of the body.  In fact, some estimates say that 85% of chronic disease is related to stress. 

Well, guess what.  In case you do not already know, stress begins with thought.  Its source is not outside of you; it is inside of you.  That is why I talk about managing stress from the “inside out”.  Stress begins with thought, and thought is controllable. 

Self-Mastery and Conscious Creation

Self-Mastery is having awareness of your contribution to the creative process of your own reality.  It is mastery over the ego intellect and using the power within you to consciously create the outcome of your life. 

This is where purpose and destiny comes in.  If you sleepwalk through life on autopilot, unaware of how your thought and feelings create your experience of reality, you will continue to feel victimized and will play it safe as to avoid confronting your own limiting beliefs. 

This will take you to a fate of living out your unconscious, robot-like habits that have been passed down to you by well meaning, but also often unhappy or unfulfilled people.  If you wake up and understand the creative process, you can begin to consciously unfold your true destiny.

Marching toward this "fate" is certainly not thriving.  As Maya Angelou said, “surviving is important, thriving is elegant”.  Want to start living an elegant life?  One step is to start to realize that your thoughts and feelings really matter and that they are the starting point of everything from your health, to your wealth. 

This will determine ultimately where you live and work, and who you attract in your relationships.  We are hearing more and more about the “Law of Attraction”.  This law that addresses the energy of vibration is nothing new, but due to a number of factors, it is beginning to surface into the awareness of the masses of people. 

This is good as it opens the door to having new conversations about possibility.  We hear about how our brains use only 10% of its capacity.  Well, aren’t you curious about the other 90%?  I was and I am.  This is why I started out, even at the age of twelve, questioning life and wondering how I could improve the quality of my life. 

We have been subject to his law of vibration all along; the issue is we have not been aware of it and we have been creating what we don’t want. 

Quantum Physics: What's Your Vibe?

Quantum Physics revels that everything is energy.  Everything is energy.  This reference to energy sometimes spooks some people out and others think it is woo-woo.  

Unfortunately, ignorance is not bliss. 

What you don’t know can sabotage your life and it has never been more important that you become aware of “reality”.  What I mean by this is that there is more to life than what you can experience with your five senses of sight, sound, smell, taste and touch. 

Just because you are not aware of the Law of Vibration does not mean that you are not affected by it.  It would be the same if you refused to believe the Law of Gravity.  Whether you believe it or not, if you go outside and jump off of the roof of your house - you are going down! 

Well, it is the same with the Law of Vibration.  Like attracts like.  We live in a vibratory Universe and it responds to preset parameters and principles.  This is true whether you are aware of them of not.  For example, we know that your energy flows where your attention goes.  If you are giving your attention to negative media all day, or worrying and focusing on doom and gloom, do not be surprised if it really starts to pour into your life! 

What you focus on expands. 

Empowerment: Attitude Determines Outcome

Success in life is determined not so much by what happens to you but how you deal with what comes your way.  I went to see the movie “Slumdog Millionaire this weekend.  I found it to be an emotional rollercoaster, heavy on the downer side. 

I thought that it contained many deeper messages that dealt with empowerment.  The main character Jamal, had many challenges to overcome, but he used the difficulties of his life to his benefit when he found himself on a game show that was symbolic of his way out of a life full of tragedy. 

He was able to use the experiences which seemed at the time horrible, and take the information gained to use it for his good in his present situation.  I thought it was a very good lesson on how our attitude, our ability to let go of a sense of victimization and instead stay present to opportunity, can determine the outcome of our life. 

If he had become angry and bitter, chances are not only would he not have found himself in a situation to move to a higher quality of life, but his bitterness could have lead him to make choices that would have gotten him in the same trouble as some of the other characters in the movie. 

Our attitude really will determine our altitude.